Guilt trap

Probably guilty that I lost my temper at Bryan this morning…and coincidentally, i had an appointment to go for a lunch time shopping…I ended up buying 2 new toys and a story book (which i know Bryan will totally lurvvve).

He’s gonna be a happy boy this evening.

Monday blues

Bryan woke up this morning, saying that he wants to go popo house instead of school. “Monday no school. I don’t want to go RS. I want to go Popo house.”

When Bryan came downstairs, he turned on the TV to Playhouse Disney channel, and discovered that the channel had been blocked. We had just installed the cartoon channels for him 2 weekends ago. We kept the channels locked except on weekends. So cry la… insist that we turn on the channel for him. Of coz not la.

Then Dylan poo in his diapers just as we are ready to leave the house. And I had to wash his bum-bum and change him.

In the car, as I buckle Bryan into his car seat, Bryan & Dylan started fighting for the same lantern – Dylan’s lantern. Bryan insists on showing his didi how to play with the lantern. Didi of course, refused. The lantern was turned on and the ladybug was flapping its wings. As they fought, Dylan held on to the ladybug’s wings. I was afraid that they will break the wings. So I reached over to Dylan place and took his hands away from the wings. I accidentally pressed my hand onto Bryan’s body as I did that. And he started to blame me of hurting him, “Mommy u pressed me here. You make me tong tong.” (pain)

Wuahhhhhhhhhhh…. I tried to apologize but he continued to complain and complain. Lost my temper and slam the door shut.

So crying continues in the car as we drove off.

After a while, Bryan stopped crying and he concentrated on playing with his own latern – a bee (he say butterfly la). Unfortunately, he was a little too rough with the lantern, and broke one of the wires, causing the lantern to stop “flying”. Only got sound, no more movement and lights.

So cry cry cry again….

*pulls hair*

Reached my parents house, and he complained to my dad that his butterfly (bee la…) cannot fly already. Dad promised to fixed it for him by the time he come back from school.

You think he’ll shut up by then..Of coz not la… continues to wail and cry in the car. Of course, I was not helping. I was already very pissed with him that morning. I told him, “Serves u right for not taking care of your toy. Keep telling you not to bite the wires, but u continue to bite right. I am so not going to get you another new lantern.” *WUAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*

Finally reached his school. *Phew*

So glad to drop him off at school. I have no idea how SAHMs manage their kids ALL DAY and not send them to playschools. My salute to you.

Happy Birthday To ME

Happy Birthday to ME

Lessons from a baby

This morning, Bryan tried to play spider-baby again. He tried to pull himself on the display cupboard in our living room, by placing his palms on the glass door. Since the surface is flat, it is hard for him to hold on and of course he fell, brushing against the side of the cupboard (1). He tried to get himself up, and fell some more, now against the coffee table next to the cupboard (2). Determined to get up, he tried to balance and pull himself up, only to fall to the floor (3).

And did he cry? No. Instead he got angry with himself and swatted his forehead with his palms. And tried to do it all over again.

I find this amusing that i related this to my colleagues over lunch. And my friends remarked that sometimes we should look at babies and learn from them. Baby perceive pain differently from us, and their determination for success is so strong.

How true? There are indeed lessons that we can learn from a baby. Things that we forget as we age…

1. We will always make mistakes when we are learning, and life is a never-ending learning experience.
2. It’s ok to fall. Just learn to get up and try again.
3. Just because you fail the first time, it does not mean you will fail again.

These are indeed priceless lessons in life. Imagine, if a baby does not possess them, they will never learn to stand, walk, run, talk, …

As adults, we are often afraid to make mistakes, to challenge our limits and to try new things. We are hampered by our past failures and painful experiences. But if we don’t learn to let them go, how far do you think we can go…?

So tired

The last few days has been so hectic – at the office, and continue to work somemore after Bryan is asleep. The last few nights, i have been working till about 1am. So tired….

Lk also the same – a lot of work and have been working late as well. So if you go to my house now, u will see a big pile of clean laundry sitting at the corner. I just cannot find the time to tidy them up.

This morning when the alarm clock goes off at 630am, i realized LK was no longer at my side, nor is he in the bathroom.

I found him sleeping next to Bryan instead.

Shooi: Baby cry meh?
LK: Er…donno. I don’t remember why i am here also…

Cham la.
Me: i didn’t even hear baby crying over the baby monitor (if baby did la)
LK: Must have heard baby cry and went over to baby’s room to comfort him, but have no recollection of that. He did remember waking up at 530am because baby was tickling his chin, but cannot remember when or why he went to Bryan’s room in the first place.

Arrggghh…Both of us so overworked. Can’t wait for the long Deepavali & Raya holidays to start.